This is particularly appropriate at this time of year, right?
So many temptations abound and it's hard to adhere to "everything in moderation". But as I've gotten older, I've found it easy to curate what I consume. Christmas cookies, though, as essential. And let's not forget hot cocoa. And those pecan puffs or those truffles or ...
Some things are worth the weight!
I attended four funerals this summer, all for friends or relatives. And there were two other folks who passed away who didn't have a service.
I was asked to speak at one service and as I remembered the adventures I had with the deceased, I was reminded of this saying (...at least be vague). No one is perfect. Everyone has foibles. The loved one I was eulogizing had her share of oddities, but I think I managed to put a funny spin on them. It wasn't until she was diagnosed with dementia that we realized some of those foibles were a manifestation of her disease.
It's hard to see someone you love deteriorate. I think all of us would prefer to spare our loved ones that agony. The choice is almost always taken out of our hands, though. So I guess it's best to live your life as though the next day might be the last -- because it might be.
I hope when my time comes, the details are vague....
... won't notice their chains.
How many people do you know who won't change their opinions even when presented with facts?
I know, I know. How can we trust 'facts'?
Here's a rule of thumb: anytime a fact makes you question your beliefs, double-check that fact. Go to sites that you normally wouldn't visit.
If two sources say it's right, then your belief is wrong.
You know, the older I get, the less I care about my appearance.
That's not to say I'm a rambling wreck, but I don't do a lot to enhance my looks. I swipe on a bit of makeup, make sure my clothes are clean and comfortable, and that's about it.
I was never good with the whole appearance thing. Maybe that's why I gravitated to a job where I could wear jeans every day. Whatever it was, I'm glad I never had to "dress for success" because I would have failed. Every day was casual Friday for us.
I wonder how much time I've saved because I never fussed with hair or face?
Food for thought ...
Sometimes the answer is no.
I think this is important to remember. Just because I think something is important or right, that doesn't mean it is.
I do wish some people in the government would remember this, too. Futile wish, I know.
FOCUS.
This sums up what I've been reading from others who feel overwhelmed by the current state of affairs in our country. It seems as though every time I look at social media or the news, I'm seeing some new outrage.
I want to STOP IT ALL. I want to go back to the time when America had potential to be a moral leader. Now this country has become an arrogant bully with no moral center.
That's when I tell myself to FOCUS. The fact that a slim majority of those who voted chose an amoral felon to lead us does not mean that I have to change.
I still support trans people, gay people, women, minorities, those who are handicapped or disenfranchised. I will continue to support them no matter what the government does.
FOCUS on what can be done: write to the politicians, support those who are fighting in the courts, give money to those who can make a difference. You can't do everything.
FOCUS.
that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
I think the last election proves this point.
Ain't it the truth?
There's been a lot of talk about AI lately. I took a bunch of AI classes back in the day and the same thing I learned then applies now: GIGO.
Garbage In, Garbage Out. In other words, a system is only as good as what data it's given. AI systems require (1) huge amount of storage capacity and (2) huge amounts of energy to run the fans that cool the storage capacity and (3) huge amounts of data in order to craft reasonable results.
Sure, you can run systems without those things, but it'll be GIGO and will be obvious (I sometimes wonder if that's what's happening with Trump,,,but I digress). I'm not too worried about the Rise of the Machines or Skynet taking over the world.
Not yet, at least...
but sometimes several days attack me at once.
I'm feeling attacked right now. Six years ago I had my right hip replaced. Earlier this year I was feeling the same kind of "ow" in my left hip. In April, it got bad. I went to Urgent Care and yep, I'm due for a new left hip. It's bone-on-bone there.
Here's the kicker: I went to the Ortho group attached to my primary care and I can get in for surgery in July. That means three months (from time of diagnosis) of disabling pain.
I immediately tried to get appointments with the other two surgical options I have here, and will see those providers in mid-month. I'm hoping I can get in earlier than July. That's one of the downsides of being in a smaller metro area--not many options.
I am, essentially, disabled now. I used to walk 10K steps a day and went to the gym 4x a week. Now I cheer if I get 5K steps and the gym is on hold. I still lift weights (at home) and am doing leg exercises (gingerly) to prep for surgery. This ain't my first rodeo so I know what to expect.
I've had back pain all my life, but I can cope with that. But now I am hobbling and while the drugs I was prescribed somewhat mitigate the pain, it's always there.
Paradoxically, this has made me realize how lucky I am. Let me count the ways:
(1) the first major (hopefully temporary) disaster in 71 years
(2) drugs
(3) I am not in a war zone nor am I a displaced person suffering like this
(4) I have a caregiver who can assist me
(5) drugs (it bears repeating)
(6) I have distractions: books, my writing, streaming TV.
But most of all, there's this: there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know what is wrong and I know it can be fixed; perhaps not back to 100%, but better than now.
I imagine all those people who have chronic pain with no 'fix'. What must it be like to know that this is the best it gets? I have hopes I'll be better. How does someone who hasn't even been diagnosed feel? How desperate, how depressing, how mind-numbing that must be.
So yeah. My summer is sort of shot. But I have ice, drugs, heat, a home, a diagnosis, and a chance to get it fixed. I am so much better off than so many people and I know it.
But I still may whine now and then. 🤔
... but fat cells live forever.
I've always been an exerciser; every day, pretty much 360 days a year, I exercise. I either walk or go to the gym and lift weights, or I hop on my little ski machine -- something. It hasn't put a dent in that pesky 10 pounds I'd like to lose, but I am in pretty good shape for my age.
A friend of mine just started exercise. She goes to the gym 3x a week and finds that she enjoys it! Like me she just wants what I call 'occupational fitness' -- to be able to walk a bit without puffing, to get out of a chair unaided, to get up from the floor with a minimum amount of fuss. She is not a morning person, so she goes in late morning and goes out for lunch afterward.
I firmly believe that it's a matter of habit to do this; I get up in the morning, put on my 'gym clothes' and either go to the gym or head to the basement to hit the treadmill or ski machine. For her, it's planning her day to have the mid-day break. She could never have done that when she worked full-time, but now she's retired and she can.
Habits are pesky things, good and bad. It's useful sometimes to examine them and decide whether to keep or not. If possible. How much of what we do is thought-out and how much is routine?
Hmm...
...you pick up speed.
Man, there are some days when I feel every one of my 71 years and ask myself, "When did that happen? Where did that ache come from?"
I've found I can't stay on my feet for any real length of time. Oh, I can take walks and I can move around, but ask me to stand in one place and move slightly (think "retail") and my back seizes up just thinking about it. I see people who look at least my age and I wonder how they do -- and I hope that they don't *have* to do it because of financial difficulties.
I am so thankful that (1) I had a good job all my life and (2) I was able to save enough for a comfortable retirement and (3) I was intelligent enough to realize that I needed to do so. Given the precarious nature of the world today, it's a worry if I'll have enough.
Maybe someone will need to put me on an ice floe and let me drift off to sea (if there are any ice sheets left). Or like my husband said, "strap a keg of beer to my back and parachute me into the depths of Yellowstone. I'll take my chances with the bears."
Not a bad idea ...
How about a fountain of Smart?
As we enter an election cycle (and it's WAY too long) this seems particularly appropriate. The older I get, the more I realize how much I miss the Good Old Days. It feels like we've lost all civility, common sense, and old-fashioned goodness.
Take book banning -- common sense tells anyone that if a child wants to find *that* book, he/she will find it. Why ban it? Why not have the child read the book then sit down and discuss the 'disturbing' elements with the child. That helps a kid be better prepared to face the world, because sure as sh*t the kid will meet *those* people in the world.
Book banning strikes close to home for me because one woman's porno is another woman's romance.
Who decides? It shouldn't be those in power. It should be up to the individual.
...but misery is optional.
This has always sort of been my motto (that and "Often wrong but never in doubt").
Let's face it, at some point we'll hit a bump, we'll be derailed, we'll hit a pothole. Life Will Be Tough. I'm not saying that we need to laugh at our ills, but I try to take it in stride. None of us are getting out of here alive so we should try to enjoy every minute we're here as far as we can.
And yeah, I wake up some days and lay in bed and think "okay, this isn't good, my back hurts so much I don't know if I can move." And then I move, and I moan, and I groan, and I move some more and pretty soon the OTC painkiller kicks in and before I know it I'm at the gym working on that Underarm FlipFlop machine and I guess I'll live another day.
Misery is optional. Unless you're outside in mosquito weather and you forgot your bug spray.
Then Misery really is Us.
..., if we realized how seldom they really do.
I am reminded of this every swimsuit season. How many people worry about how they look in that swimsuit or those shorts or that top? It took me a long time to say "the hell with it" and to wear what I want to wear.
I try to look good in what I wear, but really, I'm older and it is what it is. There are saggy bits and there are bouncy bits. I try very hard not to over-expose what I have but I'm not going to cover it all up, either, not when it's 80 degrees in the shade and humid.
I mean, really -- nobody cares what I look like, right?
And what am I doing in this handbasket?
That's how it feels sometimes -- I swear, where does the time go and where does life take me? I have some friends who are having medical issues, and I've been trying to help, but it's tough. Sometimes life does just take unexpected turns.
I suppose that's why I love to write novels. When I'm in the middle of writing, I'm somewhere else. It's not always a Happy somewhere else, but it takes me away from where I am. I can always switch my brain into "what would my characters be doing now" mode.
Ah yes. Writing. A lifeline for people like me.
...because supply exceeds demand.
This seems so appropriate on this, an election day.
I always mute the TV when political ads come on. I don't care who they are: Mute. I also don't read any political junk sent to me. I do read the newspaper, but I don't delve deeply into politics. I don't trust politicians and I don't trust news people. We no longer have a Walter Cronkite or Harry Reasoner to trust.
I abhor the direction where our country is sliding. I hate the underbelly that was exposed by Trump (yes, those supporters are deplorable). My feelings for many family members changed when they came out in support of him and I can never go back to the happy acceptance of them.
You see, I thought we all had the same values but we don't. And I just can't compromise on that. This isn't about a single topic (abortion, voting rights, taxes). It's about basic human decency.
Yep, talk is cheap. Actions speak the loudest.
... for maturity.
There are times when I feel every minute of my 70 years, and this week is one of those times. To start with, I fell down -- hard -- on a hardwood floor and that resulted in bruises and some creaks and groans. I also have a continuing problem with severe leg cramping (no one knows why), and that's come back. I had a month or two of no cramping at night, but it's back with a vengeance.
Whenever I complain like this, I think of those people who have lived with chronic pain of any kind, be it mental or physical, all their lives and it makes me pause. I know my pains are temporary or can be solved with a bit of medication. What would it be like to never have the sense that the pain might go away?
::shudder::
Some don't have film.
Of course, this doesn't apply anymore, does it? No one uses film, right? I don't know about you, but now that I take photos with my phone, I take way too many photos. You have to say this for old film cameras: I used to stage my photographs a lot better than I do now because I knew it would cost me money to develop that picture.
That's true of many things nowadays. So much is disposable. I think about that as I do some crocheting in the evenings. I donate everything I make and I don't begrudge the effort I put into it. I know some people won't value the blanket or shawl I make, but that's okay. I'm doing it for myself as much as for them. I like listening to books as I sew, so it's a win-win for me. If someone considers what I'm doing as disposable, well, I guess that's okay.
... nothing would get done.
I'm one of those people who normally sets a deadline then I try to hit that deadline early. I know some folks who work great at the last minute. I am not one of those. I can do it, but I'm not happy with it.
I've found since I retired that I'm still doing the same thing. I set a deadline for a book I'm writing -- "Let's wrap this one up by April 15" or "I want all reviews done by July 1." Then I work to meet that deadline.
Oh, yeah, stuff gets in the way now and then, but usually I can do it. I wonder why it is that I am deadline-driven. I certainly didn't worry about homework or chores or things like that growing up. I don't remember sweating any studying (except for New Math which caused me no end of heartache. I remember the appearance of that textbook to this day and I shudder). I always got reasonable grades for the little amount of effort I expended.
I think it's that if I set a deadline, I have a definite goal. I want to have things nice and tidy in my life because so much is untidy elsewhere -- let's face it, the world is in a shithole right now and there's so little I can do about it. Maybe if I manage my own time, the world will feel better to me.
Something to ponder on one of those sleepless nights, perhaps.
Or perhaps not. 😀
-- and throw away three weeks before you need it.
I was in a meeting yesterday with friends and one mentioned they're cleaning out a hoarder's house. She described it and I shuddered. I dislike clutter of any kind, but then I realized that one man's clutter is someone else's comfort.
My sister thinks my house is cluttered. Hers is very minimalistic while mine has Things. All Things I use, but more Things than hers. I have bookcases, she has none. I have cubby drawers. She has none. I have a somewhat large desk, 2 computer monitors, and she has one small desk, one computer.
I use all my Things. Yes, I could pare down my Things, but I use them. Why pare down? Perhaps hoarders feel that way, too. I could get rid of Things but why? I have room for them and I use them. Is that the key difference? I use my Things?
Hmm. Something to consider?
